it is difficult to reminisce about heartfelt memories that don’t exist
the longing of someone, something…
perhaps we are reaching for warmth that does not exist
never truly hungry,
we only search for the rich and exotic tastes in life
yet filled with disappointment when what we receive doesn’t match our fantasies
piles of responsibilities, abandoned
complaining of the lack of joy and excitement our pitiful lives offer
yet we separate ourselves from the small delight
of the glowing sun, radiating
bathing the now green grass and
small flower buds in an angelic light, sparkling
and so we stay indoors, surrounded
by artificial lights, and the
flittering lights of channels passing by
hoping that this kind of light
can fill up the empty void within our hearts
Quarantine has been evoking emotions of boredom and sadness for no apparent reason. I wanted to express this feeling of emptiness into words because no word can specifically describe what I wanted to express.
The poem is quite literal, it isn’t difficult to see the deeper meaning behind the words.
The first stanza emphasizes the feeling of loneliness. It is oftentimes forgotten that one does not need to undergo heartbreak or broken relationships to feel lonely. Individuals often want to feel loved, and even when surrounded by family and friends that care about them, it is difficult to have the tangible feeling of love without a significant other. Most want to experience that feeling of ‘love at first sight’ and the feeling of having someone on their mind… it sounds childish, but it is a warm feeling that cannot be comprehended without experiencing it first.
The second stanza is quite literal. Lately, I’ve been feeling the need to eat, even though I am not hungry. I suppose it is just to taste something, anything… anything sweet, flavorful, savory. I remember watching these food videos, and it looked amazing, so appetizing, but when I had it myself, it was always somewhat subpar. This small detail only contributed to my gloomy life.
The third stanza is also literal. Many students and even adults can agree that working at home is slowly but surely drowning our will to motivate ourselves and stay productive throughout these long days. There is no excuse for being busy anymore, and although nothing else preoccupies the mind, we can never seem to complete tasks at a reasonable time with actual effort. Despite having plenty of ‘to-dos’, there always seems to be something to blame, we find a reason to justify why we act the way we do.
Tying the third stanza into the fourth, I tried to emphasize the beauty of nature, something that was constantly looked over when lives were busy with school, work, and responsibilities. It is strange how even when all those responsibilities are reduced and even neglected, individuals still breeze over the small beauties that surround them. Now flowers are starting to bloom, spring has sprung. Spring symbolizes change and new beginnings, but it seems that most have stuck to familiar habits and hobbies instead of exploring new opportunities. I simply emphasized my feelings into imagery.
The fifth and last stanza emphasizes the effect of technology on individuals. Most of us have broken sleep schedules, and that is due to the distractions on social media that will simply not let us rest peacefully. We try to distract ourselves using forms of entertainment on the internet to keep us feeling alive, but we flip through channels with disinterest, only to sleep and wake to repeat the same cycle over and over again. We hope for a change, but we dream without taking action.