a funeral for my childhood

The following is a polished poem inspired by Pablo Neruda’s, ” I Explain A Few Things”. I took the themes of destruction and death and instead mourned the loss of my innocence and childhood, the same way people would mourn the loss of a loved one in the war. There are also pieces of his poem integrated with my own writing. I know this is more simplistic than my usual style of poetry, but I think it’s also one of the most real things I’ve written in a long time. Our presentation on the Spanish Civil War can be found here

i want to have a funeral

for my childhood

to bury her under fresh soil

and bid farewell

but i’m not sure how to say goodbye

to someone whom i’ve never been

properly acquainted with



i want to tell her how much i miss

everything she was

and everything she could have been

and how i feel like i’m burying

a part of myself

that died a long time ago

but i didn’t realize it was her

until i started to feel

so empty

and all the lilacs disappeared


i want to tell her that i will be mourning

her loss for a very,

very long time,

and so will my mother

i want to tell her that i see her in

my little sister

and i pray that she holds her hand

until she is ready to let go 


it will be a lovely service

and she will feel like

the colour yellow

and she will look like

mismatched braids in my hair

when i was five

and cherry popsicle stains on

sticky fingertips


on her tombstone i will write:

the light of June drowned flowers in your mouth

thank you

for everything

i’m sorry i let you go so quickly

i guess i thought you would just

hold on to me

for a much longer time

it seems like i only knew you

for half a moment

but i love you nonetheless


i hope that one day

i’ll see you in my daughter

and i hope she will think the sky is made

of cotton candy

and that all boys are as kind

and brave as her father


i hope there are stars in her eyes

and galaxies in her mind

i hope that my daughter understands

your importance

before you start to fade


this funeral for

my childhood

will happen right before sunrise

and as she is lowered into

the ground

i will watch the light clothe

her tired skin and weary eyes

until she comes back

to my dead house

my broken soul

to meet me once more.


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