Will Always Remember

old_hands_by_neledesaeger-d69pqlu

Stuck somewhere no man wants to go,

In someone else’s shoes.

It was tough,

I tried his shoes,

That was uncomfortable.

Barely worn with only seventy-three years to them.

Said there was too much distraction around him,

Too much hollering,

Too much crying.

He was tired.

 

I tried his body,

That was worst, it had too many diseases running through it.

I thought it would be warm, maybe even hot.

It was cold,

The kind of cold that made him miserable.

His eyes,

With a faint sparkle,

For all the cruel things he has seen.

Now at rest.

His mouth,

To tell the funniest jokes,

And the worst of insults.

Shut for all the arguments he never won.

Now at rest.

His ears,

To listen to the compliments,

To listen to the doubt.

After a while, you couldn’t hear,

So much so that a hearing aid couldn’t help,

Now at rest.

His smile,

To let you know that he was okay.

To let you know he wasn’t scared of reality.

His eyes,

To let you know he was listening,

To intimidate you.

Now at rest.

His glasses,

That took up half his face,

To help him read the bitter words one couldn’t speak.

His hair,

Turned to gray,

A depressing color,

That only made him look younger.

His voice,

To let you know what was on his mind,

To let you know he was always close and never far.

Now at rest.

His arms,

That gave the best hugs.

Now at rest.

His hands,

To let you know he was a hardworking man.

Now at rest.

His legs,

Had too much exercise,

They said he was always chasing a running target.

Now at rest.

His skin,

To be more sensitive than he was.

To feel more than he did.

His heart,

That was hard as a rock but fragile like glass.

That stopped beating because it was too tired to continue.

Now at rest.

 

Rest in Peace.

Grandpa

 

(Love your 4th oldest grandchild)

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2 thoughts on “Will Always Remember

  1. “To help him read the bitter words one couldn’t speak.”

    This line completely blew me away, maybe this isn’t your best piece yet but it’s extremely impressive and it contains much insight; I feel like your poetry is something I’ll look forward to read in the future. I find it quite interesting how you chose to describe each sense and body part along with each feeling a soldier may experience; it’s interesting for me to read this poem because I’ve never encountered something like it, I’ve read Wordsworth, Tagore, Keats, Shelly, and Byron, and Though I can’t pinpoint it there’s something different about your style of writing poetry than them, perhaps it may just be a product of the amount of effort and love you poured into this, but whatever you’ve got here is incredible. You speak with a lot of clarity and your words are powerful yet few in number; there’s a lot of pathos in your writing which shows the reader exactly how much of your heart this piece was inspired by.

    Of course this being a piece that seems quite personal for you, I can’t exactly much criticism without changing anything. Maybe some word choices, simple grammatical things. Maybe sit with a thesaurus to find words that may give more impact in your writing.

    Other than what I’ve offered I would like to thank you for writing this peace.

    ~Nilave

  2. Dear Nilave,

    Thank you so much for your comment. I am extremely happy that you enjoyed it! I look forward to reading your poems as well.

    Thank you again,
    Amika

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